Month: August 2016

Day 27- Gratitude Project 

I’m grateful for my mom today. Like many moms, she has stuck by me, even if she didn’t agree with me. But beyond that, she and my grandma taught me everything I know about hard work, dedication, selflessness, and most of all, family. Both of them are/ were the hardest working people I’ve ever known. My grandma passed away when I was a teenager, but she taught my mom everything, so my mother is a direct reflection of her in my eyes. 

Yes, my mom has plenty of shortcomings that make me crazy, but even though the world has been on a personal mission to beat her down, she’s never lost her ability to dream big. Sometimes, too big, but I digress. 

Mom is a hopeless romantic, even if men have treated her terribly. She’s made it her life mission to escape her childhood and become a Ph.D. By the end of this year, she will achieve that goal. She has taught me that even if the chips are down, never give up, and keep working hard. 

Because we were poor growing up, she taught me how to budget, live on little, appreciate what I have, and to be resourceful. She also taught me everything about being a fiercely independent woman in a world where fierce women are not appreciated as they should be. I can do anything, simply because my mom never let me forget it, and never ever gave up on me. 

Throughout my life, she’s been my biggest advocate. She sat in 18 degree weather, outside mind you, to watch me play roller derby. She missed one bout (the word for game), in the 9 years I was playing.  When I was in high school and I was being tortured, she was there, standing up to the administration because they stood by the perpetrators. She lied to my guidance counselor so I could graduate from that godawful place early, because dropping out was not an option. I’m grateful she pushed me toward getting an education, even though it hasn’t exactly panned out the way I want. 

She’s pushed me to be the very best person I can be, someone whom my grandma would be proud of. She never lets me forget how much she loved me, and reminds me all the time that she would be so happy with the woman I’ve become. I’m grateful that she never lets me forget her. 

I’m grateful for all the challenges in my young life, as they prepared me for adulthood quite well. I’m grateful that my mom was there, showing me how to be a productive member of society, but never losing the ability to dream big. My grounded, responsible nature sometimes thinks she’s batshit crazy, but I guess we all need that in our lives too. I’m thankful for that. I’m thankful for my mom and her guidance. Plus, now that I’m an adult, we can hang out and have drinks together and talk about everything and nothing. As we get older, the more like her I think I become, and the more like longtime friends we can be. I’m thankful for that too. 

0

Day 26- Gratitude Project 

I’m grateful for short days at work, a marvelous team that truly works together for the good of everyone, and for rain- but not too much- just a little. 

Yesterday I had an appointment so I only worked a half day. I’m truly thankful that I didn’t have to be there longer. There were way too many crazy things going on, too much chaos, for me to be able to manage a full day. The highlight in my short day was that it was going off the rails for my whole team, but we worked together for the afternoon and finished strong. 

Not only that, but we also got a few things organized for the coming days. I love it when we have stuff sorted out early, instead of being reactionary. 

I’m also grateful for the rain that came in the afternoon. My inlaws are not grateful for their entire house flooding. I’m sorry they’re going through such a tough time. We went over to their house as soon as we found out. 

There wasn’t much we could do until the water receded, but we were there to help salvage anything that might have been seriously damaged, and of course for moral support. But here in the desert, we need an occasional rain. Please note: I said occasional. I’m a desert dweller for a reason and if I wanted rain, I’d live in Seattle. However, my plants in the garden can always use some extra water as I’m sure could our water table. 

I’m thankful that my husband got to enjoy the rain with our baby as well. She’s never really been in the rain, so they got to play together in the backyard. I watched from the covered patio. I’m grateful for that too. 

0

Day 25- Gratitude Project 

I’m grateful for the small moments with my husband. We get very little time, just the two of us, since becoming parents. I love being a mom, more than I thought possible, but I also sometimes just miss being a person. Being able to sit on the couch with my husband for a few minutes on nights the baby goes to bed without a big production and I’m not exhausted myself, is a rare event. 

We got to share about 20 minutes last night, just chatting and eating a cookie, while watching tv. I had time to load the dishwasher and tidy up the kitchen too. Of course, the baby fussed and realized she was in the bedroom alone and woke up. She almost made it back to sleep, but not quite before she hit her second wind. She did have a 2 hour nap, after all. 

So daddy took her until she started getting sleepy again while I laid down to get a little rest before she came back to bed. I’m grateful that he hung out with her until she was tired again. 

I’m also thankful for her naps on the weekends. It gives us a chance to do things that are difficult to do when she’s awake, like yard work and other chores. We’ve learned to use her naps to get things done, reconnect, and relax. I’m grateful for these lessons in time management and adulting. 

As our baby gets older, we will have more time to ourselves I’m sure, but until then, I’m pleased that we get them occasionally. Nothing can bring back our childless days feelings, or even our single days feelings, but it’s nice to get a few moments every once in a while of quiet and rest. I’m grateful. 

0

Day 24- Gratitude Project

I’m grateful that life keeps reminding me of my limitations. For example, what I think I can accomplish in a day, is generally vastly more than what I can do in a day. The universe is constantly reminding me that I’m only human and cannot do everything. I’m thankful for this. Life continually throws distractions, roadblocks, and wild goose chases in my path so that I slow down and remember that everything is unfolding just as it’s meant to. 

While I’m racing to an invisible finish line, against faceless opponents, the universe is regulating my pace through direction and misdirection, teaching me lessons along the way. I’m learning to follow my authentic self, and learning to SLOW DOWN. All I want is to get to the end of the race so I can bask in the glory of completion, and so I can move on to the next thing. 

There is no NEXT THING. This is it. This is THE THING. I’m grateful that the universe continually is making sure I understand this. Of course it all goes off the rails pretty regularly. The universe focuses on keeping me on track, but still humble. My gratitude for this knows no bounds. 

An example of this is last year I was contacted by a former supervisor that I did some contract work for. He wanted me to come on board permanently. There were lots of hoops to jump through with my company and with his. However, I felt like something wasn’t right, timing or something. Suddenly, I declined the position. 

I hated my job, but my gut was telling me not to do it. Plans my family was working on fell through, and I was pretty disheartened. I gave up this lucrative job for nothing. I was angry. I ended up staying at my job several more months. We ended up selling our house and buying a new one on the other side of town from my work, and even further from that job I let go. Instead, a job that was MUCH more exciting, far less demanding, and less than 5 miles from our new home basically landed in my lap. I just had to show up for the interview. I took that job and I even make more money than the one I didn’t take. I’m grateful for the universe showing me it wasn’t right. 

I’ve experienced other situations where the universe seemed to conspire against me, only to reveal that my best interest was always at heart. During those times it’s frustrating that I’m not getting my way. I get angry when things don’t work out as I painstakingly planned. I’m grateful that life proves that the universe has bigger plans than I do. I just have to be patient and allow them to unfold. I’m thankful for the lessons of patience. 

0

Website Powered by WordPress.com.

Up ↑