Tag: Buddhism

Right Speech-Update

I’ve got about 3 weeks to feel like I’m making progress in my goals this time around.

I have to admit that I’ve been crabby and swearing has been difficult to abstain from, however I’m doing really well at not participating in gossip. I could probably be more complementary, but I’ve definitely been more aware of sharing my positive feelings with those that need them. I’ve also refrained from nagging and chosen my words more carefully, as needed.

One thing that I can’t say that I’m perfecting is my ability to not make myself look stupid. I’m sure that it’s mostly my neurotic self over analyzing every single word I say, since, let’s face it… I care more than I let on about what people think of me. I say something that I think is stupid or sounds much better in my head than how it sounds coming out of my mouth. It’s an unfortunate affliction. Sometimes in conversation, I almost want to bail out as soon as possible because I will ramble or say something dumb and embarrass myself. I’m trying to stop worrying so much about looking dumb, but I’m a perfectionist and that’s a work in progress.

Here’s to making another attempt tomorrow! Cheers!

(http://www.smileyme.com/lprod.asp?lookup=1196)

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Happiness is…

To me, the simple things in life are true happiness. Here are some of my favorites:

The calm of dawn when the world is just waking up.

The purr of a sleepy cat.

The perfect downward dog performed by a stretching pup.

The bashful smile of a little kid who is shy but also happy to see you.

The cool breeze as I water the garden.

A nice, long, hot shower.

Stretching.

The first sip of hot coffee.

Clothes straight out of the dryer.

The first bite of chocolate cake.

Talking with others about everything and nothing.

Seeing the pets waiting for you as you come in the door.

My car starting, stopping and doing all the things it does to get me places.

A long hug.

Quietly reading a book in the sunshine.

A good white wine.

A cold glass of water on a hot day.

A good meal.

These are just some of my favorite, happy, simple things. Please comment to share yours! Thank you for reading.

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Happiness in various forms

I’ve been in one of those introspective moods this week and I’ve been heavily considering aspects of the world around me, thank you auto-pilot at work.

Anyway, I decided to start reading a book that my dad sent me about finances and getting out of debt. Now, I’m not in a particularly large amount of debt, relatively. I’ve got student loans that I’m going to have to start paying next year, a mortgage and a small amount of credit. However, financial security is something that I’ve wanted and until fairly recently, I had. In the last year, I’ve gone from living well within my means to having a couple of credit cards, which I’ve not had since I was an irresponsible teenager, and a home purchase added to the scheme of things.

I consider myself a fairly educated person about money and finances. I lived for many years with nothing more than a checking/savings account and my incoming paychecks to fall back on. I learned, be it the hard way, at a young age that I could not rely on credit or “creative financing” to live. I had to shop and spend smart. Being woefully unemployed and a student for some time, I had to learn to live on literally, a pittance. My student loans will be hell to pat back due to that, but the payments are such that I can pay them at this point.

Reading this book has brought to mind that knowing the difference between “want” and “need”, as well as living well below my means is a key factor to happiness and reduction in stress over bills. I really enjoyed not worrying about when things were due, juggling payments and fretting over my cash flow. I got paid when I got paid and I’m know to be the person that can literally go months without spending the money in my wallet.

I know what it is to live simply. I enjoy living modestly and feeling confident in my abilities. Lately, that’s been a little more difficult and uncertain. That has created a lot of undue stress. The house is modest as is the payment. Much lower than the rental property that was sucking the finances dry. Of course, buying a house depleted the modest savings account and having my old car totaled didn’t help any.

My point is this, happiness is such a dynamic thing in this life. Finding little glimmers of it in daily things or having peace of mind over one’s finances are true happiness. I don’t need a big fancy house, I’m good with the fixer-upper that has soul. I don’t need a new car or even a nice car, my older, slightly worn out VW works just fine… not only that, it suits me and my needs. I don’t need the newest and greatest this or that. I don’t particularly like eating out very much, too much work and too many questions I have to ask. I don’t have expensive hobbies, it could be expensive, but again I don’t need to have the newest and greatest things for that either. I find peace in that simplicity. That is one of the things that make me happy. Simplicity. If only everything were so uncomplicated… this happiness project would be over. :)

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Murphy and the Law

Everyone knows about Murphy’s Law, right? Such is my life, but in regard to the happiness project, “wrong” isn’t the right word. It’s more like, ridiculous or better yet… late. I say this because I’ve given myself two months to “perfect” the allotted goals, right? Well, the Universe has decided that I need to keep going back to other goals. This normally wouldn’t be an issue, but how am I supposed to watch what I say when so many things are happening all at once?

Which brings me to my point: Last month I aimed to meet new people that had similar interests or values to myself. Didn’t meet a single new person. The last couple weeks, met at least two that are really cool and I’d like to hang out with. They have qualities that are really great. One is intellectually intriguing and the other shares my quirky sense of humor (and sometimes ups the ante). Of course, surely they each have other qualities, but I’m getting to know them and I’m enjoying it.

Also, we are lessening the suffering all over the front yard in the last week or so at the house. There are a pack of stray cats and they’ve taken a liking to our porch and the cat food we’re compelled to give them. They’re safe and fed/watered. We cannot afford to take them all to the vet or anything, so food, water and safety is what we can do. There’s a lesson in there. I have to accept what the limitations are and be ok with that.

Anyway, that brings me to the introspective part of my post. You can opt out now if you wish. :)  Consider yourself warned. I was talking with someone at work today and they were questioning how important common interests are in relationships. I’m going to expand that idea into friend relationships too… but having things in common, at least to me is relatively important. Sharing and enjoying common experiences, that’s something I personally need in my life. Outside of a few specific instances, I’m not finding much in common with those around me. Maybe it’s me? Maybe I’ve got fairly unique tastes in hobbies? I dunno. But either way, Murphy needs to knock it off. I can’t handle the stress. :)

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A blast from the past (past goals)

Already this year I’ve had goals to end suffering of those around me, and the universe is letting me know, that goal is never fulfilled.
Exhibit A:          And exhibit B:
There is an exhibit C, but she’s rather elusive.

Anyway, these animals have adopted us this week. Exhibit A, whom we’ve named Lewis (as in Jerry Lee, since we already have an Elvis), is incredibly sweet and friendly. He loves to meow and hang around on our front porch. He tries to come inside the house, but since he’s not been to the vet, that’s not happening. We can’t put Elvis at risk of illness, if Lewis has one. We are careful to wash our hands after touching him and all that too. Elvis was here first, so our first responsibility is to keep him safe.

Exhibit B, who is officially nameless, but I like to call Scrappy, is also a sweet boy. He’s dangerously thin and extremely skittish. He’s afraid of Lewis, who just wants to make friends. But I think eventually, they’ll be buddies. Anyway, his fur is all scraggly, dirty and he just looks MESSED UP. My heart goes out to him. We have taken to feeding them because I refuse to let animals die of starvation on my watch. I know that I can’t save them all, but these two landed on our doorstep for a reason and I’ll be damned if I let them suffer. So, today I’m off to buy less expensive food, since we give Elvis expensive food because he doesn’t eat much. But if we’re now feeding the neighborhood, we need to make it affordable.

I hope that Lewis and Scrappy both have healthier lives now that we’re in them. :)

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