Tag: love

Self and Grief

Five days ago my husband almost died. He had a complication from a surgery to extend his quality of life, after being diagnosed with  stage 3 liver disease. I have been with him on the journey to a liver transplant, and it’s been quite the epic. Based how quickly the medical team in our city transferred him to the transplant hub 4 hours away, tells me all I need to know about that. 

But this essay isn’t about him, really. It’s about how I lost myself through all this. It was only a short time ago that he was diagnosed, and in just a few months, I became an empty husk of my former self. Granted, before he got sick, I was already feeing like I was being hollowed out from the microaggressions I had toward myself. The times that I said yes, when I meant no. Times that I kept silent when I should have used my voice. Slowly shrinking to “keep the peace” in an increasingly inhospitable realm. 

Anticipatory Grief

I only recently discovered there was a word for the feeling I have been carrying these last several months- Anticipatory Grief. The stage of grief before the actual grief event happens, where you expect the tragedy and prepare for it. This grief comes in waves of hope and tragedy. Highs and lows that can vacillate so wildly within seconds, if feels like a perpetual food processor. One second you are hopeful for an outcome that doesn’t result in the unspeakable. The next, you are in the depths of despair, preparing for your existence without them. As time has worn on and my patience worn thin, it has been increasingly difficult to wrap my head around the possibility that this wasn’t “the end”. 

Winning or Losing

Around the new year, an author that I deeply respect who has a skool community I am a member of, posed a question regarding resolutions for the coming year. While I have never been one to do resolutions, my response was telling. I shared to the thread that I did not want to lose myself, and instead wanted to stay dedicated to the projects I had started long before diagnosis, no matter the outcome.

I had that thought before we came within a paper thin margin of life or death. I didn’t want to lose myself in the process of loving and supporting someone else. I remain steadfast in that goal right now, as I write these words. My own Soul Death is not worth the price. 

How often do we shrink ourselves to love others? How often do we shame ourselves for living fully in our authenticity, so that others can be more comfortable? How often are we conditioned to hide the parts of ourselves that make us unique, brilliant, and strong? It is a genuine tragedy to the psyche. We hide, quiet, and even destroy the pieces that are the best parts of us, and for what? 

Current State

As of this writing, my husband is on the path to gaining strength and stamina back, to ensure a successful transplant. I have resolved to keep my spine straight through whatever comes in the future for us. By doing that, I can be my whole self- the compassionate, kind, strong caretaker/mother/daughter/friend/wife that is my nature. One who will not shrink to fit the expectations of others, but instead will be the authentic, imperfect version I am and am becoming. 

I owe it to myself, my children, and those around me. I owe it to my own inner child too. She worked very hard to keep me safe, to get me here. I owe it to her to be brave and make her proud of who we became. 

Photo by ROMAN ODINTSOV on Pexels.com
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When Grief Becomes a Mirror

Photo by Tasha Kamrowski on Pexels.com

Finding Yourself in the Aftermath of a Difficult Year

There are years that feel like a slow unraveling – threads pulled loose one by one until you’re no longer sure where the original pattern even began. Maybe this past year was one of those years for you. A year that asked too much. A year that took too much. A year that left you standing in the quiet aftermath, wondering how to stitch yourself together again.

Grief has a way of stripping everything down to the bone. It silences the noise, dissolves the masks, and leaves us alone with ourselves, our truth, our questions, our unmet needs, our unspoken longings. It’s uncomfortable, raw, sometimes brutally honest. But within that discomfort lives something sacred: an invitation back to authenticity.

Where Grief Meets Introspection

When life shakes us, the first instinct is often to reach for something familiar: routine, responsibility, distraction. But eventually, there comes a stillness we can’t outrun. In that stillness, we meet ourselves again.

Introspection during grief doesn’t look like tidy journaling prompts or beautifully structured epiphanies. It’s more like:

  • Sitting quietly with the ache in your chest
  • Realizing the things you used to tolerate no longer feel tolerable
  • Noticing which relationships held you, and which ones disappeared
  • Feeling exhausted by pretend versions of yourself
  • Wanting less noise, fewer expectations, and more truth

Grief changes our inner landscape. It shifts priorities, clears illusions, and sharpens our understanding of what matters. Not in a dramatic, movie-like way, but in tiny, everyday moments – choosing rest over obligation, honesty over performance, slowness over survival mode.

Authenticity Often Begins in the Ruins

It’s strange, but grief can make us more real than anything else ever could.

When the old ways of being fall apart, it becomes harder to hide behind “I’m fine.” Something in us whispers:

Be who you actually are.

Say what you actually feel.

Stop carrying what is not yours.

Authenticity isn’t about perfection. It’s about alignment. And grief, for all its heaviness, is a powerful realignment. It clears away the unnecessary and asks us to show up barefaced, imperfect, and entirely human.

You might find yourself:

  • Speaking with more honesty
  • Setting boundaries you once avoided
  • Prioritizing joy in small, quiet ways
  • Letting go of roles that drained you
  • Reclaiming parts of yourself you forgot

That internal shift is not weakness. It’s transformation.

Moving Forward With Tender Courage

If you’re reading this and nodding quietly, please know: nothing is wrong with you. You aren’t “behind.” You aren’t failing. You’re simply in a brave season of becoming.

Healing isn’t linear. Some days you’ll make tea, breathe deeply, and feel grounded. Other days you’ll stare at the laundry and wonder why everything suddenly feels heavy. Both are part of the journey. Both count.

Be gentle with the version of you that is trying to rise while still carrying the weight of what you’ve lost.

There Is Magic in Returning to Yourself

As painful as this year may have been, it’s also offering you something: a path back to your inner wisdom. A chance to hear your own voice again. A doorway into a life that feels more aligned, more intentional, and more you.

This is the quiet magic that grief leaves in its wake—not joy exactly, but truth. Not certainty, but clarity. Not perfection, but presence.

If you’re moving through this intersection of grief, introspection, and authenticity… take it slowly. Let yourself feel. Let yourself soften. Let yourself rebuild in your own time and in your own way.

And if you want a place to explore these moments more deeply, with others who are walking their own healing path, you’re warmly invited to join us inside Mystic Harmony Circle—a gentle community for connection, grounding, and rediscovering your inner voice.

You don’t have to navigate this season alone.

You deserve support, spaciousness, and a soft place to land.

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Embracing the Total Lunar Eclipse: A Celestial Opportunity for Spiritual Connection

As we journey through March 2025, the cosmos offers a profound event that invites us to deepen our spiritual practice—a Total Lunar Eclipse on March 13th/14th. This celestial phenomenon not only captivates stargazers but also provides a unique opportunity to connect with universal energies. Let’s explore the history of lunar eclipses and discover ways to harness their spiritual potential.

The Significance of a Total Lunar Eclipse

A Total Lunar Eclipse occurs when the Earth aligns directly between the Sun and the Moon, casting Earth’s shadow over the Moon and giving it a reddish hue, often referred to as a “Blood Moon.” This alignment is a rare event, happening approximately twice a year. In March 2025, this spectacle will be visible across North and South America, offering a mesmerizing display for those who gaze upward. 

Historical and Cultural Perspectives

Throughout history, lunar eclipses have been imbued with deep cultural and spiritual meanings. Ancient civilizations often viewed them as powerful omens or moments of transformation. In various traditions, a Blood Moon symbolizes renewal, the shedding of old ways, and the ushering in of new beginnings. This perspective aligns with the natural cycles of the Moon, representing phases of growth, culmination, and rebirth.

Connecting with Universal Energy During the Eclipse

The upcoming Total Lunar Eclipse is an auspicious time to attune yourself to the rhythms of the universe. Here are some practices to deepen your connection:

1. Meditative Reflection: Find a serene outdoor space where you can observe the eclipse. As the Earth’s shadow envelops the Moon, enter a meditative state, focusing on releasing negative energies and inviting transformative growth.

2. Moonlit Rituals: Engage in rituals that honor the Moon’s energy. This could involve lighting candles, setting intentions for personal growth, or performing cleansing ceremonies to let go of past burdens.

3. Journaling Insights: Document your thoughts and emotions during the eclipse. Reflect on areas of your life that require change and set intentions for the new cycle ahead.

4. Community Gatherings: Join with like-minded individuals to collectively observe the eclipse. Sharing this experience can amplify the spiritual energy and foster a sense of unity.

Practical Observing Tips

To fully embrace the spiritual essence of the eclipse, consider the following:

• Timing: The eclipse will occur on the night of March 13th/14th. Ensure you check local times for the best viewing experience.

• Location: Choose a spot with an unobstructed view of the sky, away from city lights, to fully immerse yourself in the event.

• Mindfulness: Approach the eclipse with a sense of reverence and openness, allowing yourself to be fully present in the moment.

By engaging in these practices, you align yourself with the celestial rhythms, fostering a deeper connection to the universe and your inner self. Embrace this Total Lunar Eclipse as a moment of reflection, transformation, and spiritual renewal.

May the cosmic energies guide you on your journey.

Note: For more detailed information on the eclipse’s visibility in your area, consult local astronomical resources.

Sources

March 2025: What’s in the sky this month? A total lunar eclipse, Venus remains bright, and Mars and Jupiter continue to dominate

https://starwalk.space/en/news/night-sky-tonight-march

https://cdapress.com/news/2025/mar/03/best-night-sky-events-for-march-2025/

What’s Up: March 2025 Skywatching Tips from NASA

https://in-the-sky.org/newscal.php?month=3&year=2025

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Mindset and Anxiety- Finding Joy and Peace in an Uncertain World

Photo by Belle Co on Pexels.com

In a world that feels increasingly unpredictable, it’s no surprise that anxiety can creep into our lives. From global challenges to personal struggles, many of us are carrying the weight of uncertainty. But here’s the truth: while we can’t always control what happens around us, we can shape how we respond.

Our mindset- the way we think about ourselves, our circumstances, and the world- plays a powerful role in how we experience life. Shifting your mindset doesn’t mean forcing positivity or ignoring real challenges. It means embracing hope, cultivating resilience, and gently guiding yourself toward peace and joy, even in tough times.

Let’s explore how to foster a mindset that eases anxiety, embraces empathy, and helps you find your joy.

1. Embrace Positivity Without Toxicity

We’ve all heard the phrases: “Just think positive!” or “Good vibes only!” While well-intentioned, these messages can sometimes feel dismissive when you’re dealing with anxiety. Toxic positivity ignores real feelings and pressures us to suppress difficult emotions.

Instead, try this:

✨Acknowledge your feelings. It’s okay not to be okay. Recognizing anxiety without judgment is the first step toward healing.

✨Reframe, don’t suppress. Instead of forcing positivity, ask: Is there another way to view this? For example, “This is hard, but I’m learning resilience.”

✨Celebrate small wins. Positivity doesn’t have to be big or loud. A warm cup of tea, a kind word, or finishing a task can be sources of joy.

Remember: True positivity comes from hope and possibility, not denial.

2. Practice Empathy- For Yourself and Others

Anxiety often makes us feel isolated. In an unstable world, empathy becomes a powerful bridge- connecting us with others and softening our inner dialogue.

How to cultivate empathy:

❤️ Start with self-compassion. Anxiety thrives on self-criticism. Instead of saying, “Why am I like this?” try, “It’s understandable I feel this way; I’m doing my best.”

❤️ Extend grace to others. Everyone is carrying invisible burdens. Approach people with curiosity, not judgment.

❤️ Hold space for difficult emotions. Empathy doesn’t mean fixing everything. Sometimes, the most powerful thing we can do – for ourselves or others – is simply being present.

Warm reminder: Empathy makes the world softer and our minds calmer.

3. Mindful Practices to Shift Your Mindset

When anxiety feels overwhelming, grounding yourself in the present moment can shift your mindset from fear to calm. Here are simple, mindful practices you can try:

✨ Breathwork: Try the 4-7-8 breathing technique- inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds. It activates the body’s relaxation response.

✨ Gratitude Journaling: Each day, write down three things you’re grateful for. Gratitude shifts focus from what’s wrong to what’s working.

✨ Limit negative inputs: Curate your social media and news intake. Protect your peace by choosing uplifting, empowering content.

✨ Grounding techniques: Engage your senses -notice five things you see, four you feel, three you hear, two you smell, and one you taste. This pulls your mind back from anxiety’s spiral.

Pro Tip: Mindfulness isn’t about perfection – it’s about gently returning your attention to the present, over and over again.

4. Finding Your Joy in Unstable Times

Joy might feel elusive when anxiety is loud. But joy doesn‘t have to be big or extravagant. Sometimes, it’s found in the simplest moments – quiet, gentle sparks of life that remind us why we keep going.

✨ Follow your curiosity. What excites you, even a little? A new book, a creative project, a walk in nature? Joy often hides in our interests.

✨ Connect with your intuition. What feels right in your body and soul? Trust those nudges – they’re guiding you toward joy.

✨ Create small rituals. Morning stretches, lighting a candle at night, or listening to your favorite song can create islands of joy in your day.

✨ Seek meaning in the everyday. Joy often comes when we slow down and notice life’s tiny miracles – a blooming flower, a smile from a stranger, the feeling of sunshine on your skin.

Encouragement: Joy is your birthright. You don’t have to earn it or wait for the perfect moment. You can find it right here, right now.

5. Dig Deeper: Awaken & Align Your Mindset and Intuition

If you’re ready to explore your mindset on a deeper level, learning how to manage anxiety through self-trust and intuition, my course Awaken & Align: Unlock Your Intuition & Step Into Your Higher Purpose is designed for you.

This transformative experience guides you to:

🌀 Quiet the mental noise that fuels anxiety

🌀 Connect deeply with your intuition for clearer decision-making

🌀 Align your mindset with your soul’s purpose

🌀 Find peace and joy by trusting yourself and your journey

You have the answers within you. Awaken & Align simply helps you unlock them.

Final Thoughts: You Are Stronger Than You Know

In uncertain times, anxiety can feel overwhelming. But you are capable of finding peace within the chaos. By embracing a positive, yet realistic mindset, practicing empathy, and seeking joy in everyday moments, you are already on the path to healing.

Be gentle with yourself.

Trust your inner wisdom.

Believe in your power to create joy- even now.

The world needs your light. Let’s nurture it together.

✨ Ready to step deeper into alignment? Explore Awaken & Align today and begin your journey toward clarity, confidence, and joy.

Follow Happiness With Mystic Harmony for more soulful insights, mindful practices, and empowering tools to help you live with purpose and peace.

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