I am proud of my ability to not drop an F-bomb today, but damn I wanted to. People are trying to make me crazy at work, so bad.
I pride myself on my ability to babysit grown adults and conduct myself professionally. I was definitely skating that line of professionalism at a couple moments today. However, my desk Slinky and a few muttering-under-my-breath choice words.
Anyway, tomorrow is finally day two! Yes! Progress!
Today was a huge change from yesterday. I feel more uplifted and positive about my ability to not only complete this challenge, but also change my mental outlook. I’m excited and feeling good.
That’s not to say today has been without frustrations or slight setbacks in my positivity, because having to deal with people in life pretty much ensures both of these things. However, I haven’t said the F-word (out loud, but I’m working on the running dialogue in my head next. Baby steps.), or even yelled at anyone while driving.
Granted, the day is not over yet and I still have a commute to run errands and home. I’m not being pessimistic, just realistic. I should be home in a few hours where I can relax and hang out with my family in relative F-word-free comfort. But until then, I’m feeling good about my progress!
Now, if I can get this Friday out the door, that’d be great!
This is going to take me a long time.
I have managed to go 5 hours (waking hours that is) without saying one or more of my “taboo” words. I knew this was going to be a challenge, which is why I chose the words I did, but seriously. People driving dangerously, arguing with my husband and frustration at work are a recipe for failure. I’m not sure that my words are what need to change, so much as everything around me at this point.
I know that is just my emotion speaking, but I already feel defeated. I’ve been an emotional rollercoaster today, and not being able to use my go-to words is not working out well for me. However, to my credit, just in writing this blog entry, I’ve chosen the intensity of my words more carefully. I already edited a couple words to make them more aligned with the true intensity of how I’m feeling and the reality of the situations. I feel like that is progress.
Speaking of intensity, I need to make an edit to one of my “negative” words. Instead of using overwhelmed as my replacement for stress, I’m going to use overstretched. I determined today that overwhelmed has about the same level of intensity for me and causes the same tight reaction in my body. Overstretched is a calmer word and elicits a lower vibration.
With that being said, tomorrow is another day. I’m going to start over tomorrow and do better. I’m going to try my best, because, let’s face it- I’m only human.
Inspiration is what I’m most grateful for today. Like love, it’s kind of an abstract concept; however, it’s almost as powerful in our lives. Being inspired to make changes, to start something new, or to end something that no longer serves you can be the thing that changes your whole trajectory in life. I often find sources of inspiration in the strangest of places, such as seeing something that someone else is doing that interest me. I like to ask them about it, how they go about doing it. I’m a fact gatherer and then I experiment. I experiment with food, crafts, DIY projects, and anything that I can get my hands on. I love creating and making stuff. I’m inspired to do that when I see other cool stuff being made.
I’m also inspired by people who do great work. They inspire me to want to do more for my community and the world at large. I truly believe that these are the people who are making a real difference in the world and they inspire me beyond words. I am always inspired to get my ass off the couch when I see such amazing progress, so many helpers, and such transformative results.
I’m also inspired by people who have overcome great obstacles. I know the human condition is pretty much nothing BUT an obstacle, but there are some of us that have been dealt a pretty shitty hand and still manage to end the game with a full house. I don’t begin to think that I’ve got it worse than anyone, but life certainly has been a struggle for me and my family. I’m inspired by those that have experienced adversity and overcome it. It gives me hope that the “light at the end of the tunnel” is not, in fact, a train.
I’m grateful for all of these sources of inspiration, how they impact my life and the lives of others, and the great things that can come from being inspired to make positive changes.
Today, I’m truly grateful for a good laugh. Everyone in my office and in my personal life has seemingly had a challenging week. This morning was filled with funk music, 90s R&B, karaoke, dancing and laughter. It was a great pick-me-up to an otherwise slogging day. Everyone was smiling and joking for most of the rest of the day and the cherry on top was a Buzzfeed article of 27 photos to warm your cold dead heart- or something to that effect. They were all HILARIOUS, but one of them had me absolutely dying. I was laughing so hard my coworkers were looking at me like I was nuts. The photo was of a small girl, around 3-4 years old; three of them side-by-side. The text accompanying it was of an aunt who was surprised to find out that her niece was attached to a plastic owl; the one you find on houses to scare off birds, instead of something the average child would have- a blanket or something. Apparently the owl was her thing that she took everywhere. She even sleeps with it! This will be my kid in no time. I’m sure of it. She’s always doing weird kid stuff… I love it. But I loved the article and it was certainly a great way to get me through the final hour or my work day. I’m thankful we can go out with a smile today.
