Tag: Television

Day 4- Gratitude Project

I am writing this post a day later than I planned because my husband decided that we were going to have a full day without screens. No phones, no internet, no TV, no computers… nothing at all. The reason behind this “day without screens” stemmed from a card game we’ve been playing called “Sneaky Cards”, and there are action cards, interaction cards, and all sorts of other things. But the premise is that it gets you out of your comfort zone, interacting with other people…

So yesterday, I was grateful for the time that my family had together without the distraction of screens. We are so dependent on the computer and phone and tablet and ipod and whatever being attached to us at all times. It was liberating and at the same time a little uncomfortable to go to the store without my cell phone. I was mostly concerned that if I got into trouble, I would have no way of contacting help. I had my baby with me, so that was my main concern. However, we made it to the grocery store unscathed. I am grateful for that.

During the day without screens my husband dug a trench to fill with concrete and then he filled it with concrete after we went to the home improvement store. This is to prevent our Houdini dog from escaping the yard when we aren’t looking. She managed to escape twice in the last few days. I’m grateful she didn’t get far, didn’t get into anything serious, and was caught and quickly put back in the house. He also cleaned out the garage while I watched our little one and went to the grocery store. We had our meals together as a family at the table, instead of on the couch in front of the tv. We listened to music, read books, and just enjoyed our time together. I’m incredibly thankful for these moments.

After dinner, my husband called off the screen-free day. This was a little earlier than the card suggested, but I’m impressed at how long we went without really missing it. However, he was sore and tired, and just wanted to relax on the couch as a family. The baby crawled around the couch and floor while we talked and played with her. We watched an episode of a show we’re watching before we went out to water the garden. Soon after, I went to bed and they went to the park to meet up with some friends. I am grateful that we had such a fulfilling day, followed by me going to bed early. I had to work much earlier than normal today, so I am thankful for the little bit of baby-free rest. She wasn’t ready for bed when I was. I’m thankful that he took her to the park so that she was tired when they arrived home. I was able to nurse her to sleep right away and fall back to sleep myself. I’m grateful for the small things, and the big things.

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Right View- Update

For March and April my goals were as follows:

Life is suffering, strive to eliminate it for those around you in ways that matter to them, not yourself
End toxic relationships for good
Cultivate wholesome relationships with like-minded people: find more vegans
Avoid attachments to unnecessary or unwholesome things: stop watching reality tv
What goes in is what comes out: go organic and/or grow it yourself

Since April is coming to a close, I figured that I should take a minute to take stock of how I’m doing with these goals. Let’s take the first one, for example. Yes, my thinking is changing about what it takes to help others and what I can do to be more effective at it. But there’s a sort of hidden meaning with this one. I want to, in addition to helping those around me, also concentrate on not beating myself up because I’m not able to help them in ways that I want to. So, my friend calls and is upset about something, I want to fix it… but really what she needs is a good listener. I feel like I’m not helping at all, but she ultimately feels better. I feel guilty because I didn’t “help her” in a way that I felt she needed. This is something I’ve been working on and there’s not really a defined measurement of success, but I know that just by being here, I’m doing all I can in some cases and that should be good enough.

Ending toxic relationships: this one is a little tricky. I want to end a few relationships with people that have exceeded their usefulness and have become toxic. I really do. But it’s hard to tell someone you rarely speak to that you want to continue to stop speaking to them. In this case, I’m just letting sleeping dogs lie, as it were. I don’t think it’s worth the stress or explanation to have to contact a person to tell them you don’t want to talk to them. I have weeded out my social media sites almost entirely of people that I’m not truly friends with or that are more stress than I can handle. Woo! Small victory!

Cultivating relationships with people is rather difficult when you’re insulating yourself and nesting. It’s hard to meet people, go out and be with friends etc when all I want to do is organize the house and work on the garden. This one is going to be a work in progress i think, but I’ve already set out the feelers and have been networking with people in my field of work. THAT might pose to be more “useful” than having friends at this point.

Unwholesome attachments are something I’m pretty good at severing, I’ve decided. Yes, I spend some time on the couch watching the tube with my honey, however, lately… it’s been “reality” shows of a different kind… home improvement shows! I could literally watch home and garden shows all day. This is sort of my new obsession, mainly because there are so many interesting ideas and new things that have come out to make my home not only functional (which is a MUST) but also really beautiful. I cannot wait to put some of these ideas in motion. It’s going to be epic!

Finally, of course, the garden. Aside from having to outsmart a small pack of animals (our dogs and the neighborhood cat population), it’s slow at best. I’m not sure if it’s the weather, the seeds we started with or what… but the garden is appearing to be a constant work in progress. Chalk one up for us though. We caged it so it’s no longer a litter box. :)

Anyway, look for more updates in the next few days as I prepare for next month and the subsequent goals!

(Calgary Buddhist Temple http://www.calgary-buddhist.ab.ca/statue.htm)

 

 

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March and April goals! (happy post- leap day!)

March and April
~Right view
Life is suffering, strive to eliminate it for those around you in ways that matter to them, not yourself
End toxic relationships for good
Cultivate wholesome relationships with like-minded people: find more vegans
Avoid attachments to unnecessary or unwholesome things: stop watching reality tv
What goes in is what comes out: go organic and/or grow it yourself

I hope that everyone had a fun Leap Day. I know it was weird for myself, writing 2/29 all day, but it was a good day as usual. I talked to a friend who’s been on my mind the last few days, so that’s always good (shout out to vegriot).

So the first part of the new year I really tried to focus inward, to make sure that I was ready for the task ahead for the rest of the year. While in a couple areas I floundered, I did really well in others. This time around I get to look outward, sort of. This is my proverbial “Spring Cleaning”, since in the American Southwest, it’s been teetering between Spring and Summer since mid-January. It was 60-ish yesterday, but all last week it was closer to 80 degrees.

Anyway, it’s important for me to feel like I’m on the right track and that not only I am happy, but that I’m contributing to the happiness of those around me. Often because of my very hectic schedule, I find myself curled up with my honey on the couch at the end of the day, chatting and checking out with some television show. Lately, it’s been a string of “Repo” shows where people are getting their cars repossessed. Sometimes the show revolves around the drivers and the melee they come across and other times it’s the people getting their cars towed… these people. WOW. Sometimes you have to wonder how much is “reality”. They’ve got to be staged. It’s often like an episode of Jerry Springer with tow trucks and weapons.

Every time I watch these programs I feel guilty. It’s sad to think that there are so many people who can’t or just don’t pay their car payments that there’s literally 10 shows on tv about them. What’s more is that it’s like watching Jersey Shore or a train wreck. You kind of get sucked into the stupidity. I’m not sure I like being part of that. It’ll be hard to convince my beloved that we can’t watch this stuff anymore. But we’ll see what happens. If I’m going to be in front of the television, which I have to admit I hate in the first place, I want to watch something of value or at least intellectually stimulating. “Bubble gum” shows are fine, I’ve got nothing against them. I love several sit-coms. But reality tv has got to go for me. I really think it perpetuates voyeur mentalities as well as people living their whole lives in the public forum. Yes, I’m a blogger and I write about my life, but the gory details are spared and I allow some serious privacy.

Another big goal is to end toxic relationships. While this may sound one-sided, it’s really not. If I am toxic to someone, I want to do them the favor of walking away or changing my behavior. I have come to understand that relationships are not the same from both sides. One side may feel like best friends and you couldn’t be closer. The other side may just tolerate you as a part of their life, barely, while secretly lamenting you. I’ve been on both sides of that equation myself. Therefore, it’s my goal to only continue relationships that are wholesome, encouraging, fruitful and fun for everyone involved. If I’m a crap friend, it’s my duty to get away from you.

By the same token, since I’ll be eliminating some people or they’ll be eliminating me… I need to find new friends that are wholesome. I want to associate with more like-minded people, rather than carrying around friends from my past forever, thinking that we are those same people. Of course, I’m bound to retain some old friends that I’m not particularly close to. I’m in no way going to just toss everyone I’m not besties with over the cliff. Not at all. But people who are a drain or I am a drain on, will not make it. This is going to be INCREDIBLY hard for me. Once I am “friends” with someone, I want to keep them, quite literally, forever. I hate ending any relationships, toxic, damaging, hurtful or not. I am the type that always seeks approval, though I often want to admit otherwise and hate it when people are mad at me for any reason, even if it’s 100% out of my control. Bending over backwards to keep someone in your life is silly and it’s not healthy.

Onward and upward! Finally, I’ll be doing a little bit of “inward” thinking too… but with purpose that radiates out. Supporting big agri-business is something I hate. I’m part of a food co op that buys local, regional and small whenever possible. I think this has been an important step in the transition to going organic. Strangely, my brother has already taken this step, but for very different reasons. I’m more about the environment and health and he’s coming from the “survivalist” mentality. Nevertheless, I love that he’s taken that step. Now it’s my turn. Since it’s getting close to planting season here in AZ, it’s time to really think about growing a garden. Having a way to produce much of my own food will allow me to spend less money on large scale grown products and more money on wholesome, local, organic foods. With that, I’m going to start composting too. I have taken note lately about how much food I waste and how much of it can be recycled into food for plants. It’s time to take that step.

I know this was a long entry and I’m sorry for that, but there was a lot to cover. Thank you all for reading. If you have any suggestions, comments or gardening tips, please feel free to share them! I look forward to reading them. Thanks again!

(above pictures from: http://www.johnsorganicworld.webs.com/ & http://www.fitnessgoop.com/2010/08/community-supported-agriculture-affordable-local-organic-produce/)

 

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